Cows

Cow tipping has never happened. It's a fact. Cow tipping is an urban legend. If it had ever been done, there would be videos of it on YouTube. There are videos of everything on YouTube. So, next time someone says that they or someone they know have cow tipped, cut them off.


One time while driving out in the country up north in Michigan, I saw a bunch of black and white cows grazing on a big grassy hillside. I had some black and white infra-red film in my camera so I pulled over to shoot some pictures of these cows. I got as close as possible. There was a fence that consisted of only two thin wires that were about two feet apart and strung onto some green vertical spikes that were stuck into the ground. The cows were too far away to really get anything good. As I stood there trying to figure out what to do about this, the cows magically came over to see what I was doing. They came right up to the fence. I knelt down and began to shoot. We were face to face and it looked great through the lens. I got real close. So close that I could feel the hair on the back of my hand gently brush the top wire of the fence. Feeling that wire made me want to steady the camera by resting my hands on it. I wondered if it was an electric fence and looked around to see if there were any signs posted. No signs. I figured that it was not an electric fence.



I rested my hands and got a very strong jolt of electricity which threw me on my ass. The first thing I remember thinking after the initial shock (pun intended) was, at least I didn't drop my Nikon F2-AS. When I got back up to resume shooting, the cows had run away. The commotion had scared them.

From time to time I think about the electric fence. I don't know why. I wouldn't ever want it to happen again but for some reason, I'm glad it happened. I would recommend it to most people.



Here's a story I've heard more than once from totally unrelated people.

After smoking a lot of pot and or hash, some people took a really long strand of a girl's hair and put it on a fly. Like a leash. They then flew the fly all around the room. In some versions of this story, the fly is high also. This was done by exhaling the smoke into a glass and putting it upside down on a table with the fly inside. He then had no choice but to get real high. Then, it was easier to put the "hair leash" on him. This story is completely made up. You would need the hands of a surgeon to tie hair around a fly's body or neck(if flies even have necks).



If you love milk, half and half, heavy cream, butter, steak, hamburgers, leather jackets or shoes,
next time you see a pasture of cows, throw them some change and thank them for all they've given you. Cow tipping.